Week Two — More “Swami” For YOU!

He is to prognosticatin' what hog jowls are to an ol'-fashioned Sunday brunch! (Um... yum?)

SWAMI WON-LOST YTD: 17-3 (.950)

Howdy Football Fans,

Great balls o’ fire! This holiday shortened week has gone faster than Junior at Daytona! The Swami picked 17 winners and 4 losers last week. That’s straight up, boy and girls, this is jus’ fo’ fun and not for gambling purposes, in case yore local sheriff ain’t told ya, they sorta frown on that stuff. Let’s get to the games. It’s gonna be short and sweet this week cause I’m runnin’ short of time!

Thursday Sept 10.

Clemson @ Ga Tech- Tigers are road kill for the Ramblin’ Wreck! Ga Tech 27 Clemson 20

Saturday Sept 12

Syracuse @ Penn St. Geriatric Joe just keeps rolling up the wins. Penn St 30 Syracuse 13

Iowa @ Iowa St.- Hawkeyes run into their Cyclone rivals with just enough geehaw to get ‘r done. Iowa 27 ISU 24

North Carolina @ Connecticut- The goats from Chapel Hill gore the Huskies. UNC 20 UConn 16

Troy @ Florida- The appetizers just keepa comin’ for the Gators. Trojans are Gator bait. Florida 45 Troy 10

Marshall @ Va Tech- Hokies try to recover from the Crimson flood in Atlanta last week. They do. Va Tech 28 Marshall 17

Arkansas St @ Nebraska- Red Wolves run into an angry bunch of Huskers in Lincoln. Nebraska 31 Ark. St. 13

BYU @ Tulane- After the Cougars made a meal of the Sooners last week, the Green Wave of Tulane should just be a cool drink to wash it down. Greenies are no match for the Cougs. BYU 34 Tulane 10

TCU @ Virginia- The Cavaliers look to bounce back after being embarrassed at home by William and Mary. Unfortunately for the Wahoos, Horny Toads don’t bounce. TCU 26 Virgnia 24

Texas @ Wyoming- The Laramie Cowboys are no match for this herd of cattle and get stampeded. Texas 52 Wyoming 10

Houston @ Oklahoma St.- After gunning down the Georgia Bulldogs, the Cowpokes of Stillwater take aim at the Cougars. Another trophy head for the Cowboys. OK St. 30 Houston 20

Notre Dame @ Michigan- Should be a good ‘un as both teams need this one to keep things going in the right direction. The Golden Domers need it worse. Notre Dame 27 Michigan 24

Eastern Washington @ California- As my pappy always said, if yore school has a direction in their name, chances are they can’t play football worth a hoot. Cal 55 EWU 6

Jacksonville St @ Florida State- The Seminole tribe is madder than a wet hen after the Canes stole that nailbiter in Tallahassee Monday night. The Injuns will sacrifice a chicken to calm their spirits. FSU 42 Jax St 13

Idaho St @ Oklahoma- The Bengals of ISU will find a posse of Sooners that are fuming after being bushwacked by BYU. A Tiger is close enough to a Cougar for OU to take out their frustrations. OU 59 ISU 10

Vandy @ LSU- The Commodores sail to the home of the Bayou Bengals and just might catch the big cats napping. Upset alert! Vandy 21 LSU 20

South Carolina @ Georgia- This should be a barn burner as always. The Gamecocks will make the Dawgs plenty uncomfortable before they get fricasseed. Georgia 23 Carolina 21

Florida International @ Alabama- The Tide is still rising and the Golden Panthers will find the water too deep. Alabama 45 FIU 16

Kansas @ UTEP- Jayhawks swoop in on a hapless bunch of Miners. Kansas 30 UTEP 17

Miami of Ohio @ Boise St.- Now that the Broncos have cooked up an Oregon Duck, the cupcake parade begins. Boise 31 Miami 10

USC @ Ohio St- The best matchup of the day features the Trojans meetin’ up with a Buckeye bunch that got a scare from the Navy boatyard last week. The Trojans will crack this Buckeye nut thanks to an offensive line that can chew up more ground than a fleet of John Deere tractors. As usual, the Big Slow 10 will be outclassed and outrun by the boys from the left coast. It won’t be pretty as the Men of Troy grind the Buckeyes into nut butter. USC 27 Ohio St. 17

Purdue @ Oregon- A wounded Duck ain’t very scary. And this Duck is definitely wounded. Another upset special as the Boilermakers boil the Ducks. Purdue 24 Oregon 20

Utah @ San Jose St.- After a whoopin’ by the Trojans, the Spartans try their luck with a tribe of Ute Indians. They won’t fare much better this week.  Utah 28 SJSU 10

That’s all for now, y’all! Gotta run.